block #2: the "friend zone" block

So this has been on my mind recently, because a friend of mine has been "friendzoned" a few times.  As one who sometimes needs to friendzone people, I'm putting this out there so that people can understand what's normally going on with the other person.  So, for my purposes, "friendzone" means:


v. to express, generally in a form that is explicit (so as not to be ignored any longer), that one does not have interest in a type of relationship with another other than that associated with a Platonic or non-romantic friendship.

How to deal with the "friendzone" block: First, realize that there basically are two possible reasons for the friendship block. The person in question isn't interested in the type of relationship you're pursuing because either 1) they're not looking for that type of relationship in general, or 2) it's probably something about you that just makes them feel like their insides are being populated by cockroaches.


Kidding.  Sometimes people just aren't compatible with one another, and it's not worth the emotional time and effort to try to make something work that really doesn't have much more of a chance than a snowman in the Sahara.


But in all seriousness, this doesn't mean that you need to go running to try to act differently to catch someone's attention.  Because as much as the idea of being rejected by someone that you really care about sucks, the idea of having to pretend to be someone you're not definitely sucks more.


What NOT to do in the event that you are the recipient of the "friendzone" block:
-cry, yell, pout, or engage in some combination of the three
-go on some kind of "revenge" spree
-whine about it to other people
-generally act like a four year old


Yes, it sucks.  But, honestly, you will go on.  It will be ok.  And think of it this way: at least someone wasn't leading you on.  Even though you may be upset now, it's better to know at the beginning than months later that "it just isn't going to work because things don't feel right."


Oh, and by the way.  You know that old saying about there being other fish in the sea?  It's true.  Sometimes it doesn't seem like they're swimming your way...but they'll get there eventually.  Just got to give them time.